Sunsay
Questions to ask your boyfriend: 30 questions to know him better (and laugh)
Even after months or years together, you never know everything about each other. The right question opens conversations you would never have had otherwise: a childhood memory, a fear nobody talks about, a dream that never came up.
Here are 30 questions to ask your boyfriend, or your girlfriend, sorted by mood: getting to know each other, having a laugh, and talking about the future. Each set also comes as cards, to keep on your phone or send to them.
How to ask (so it does not feel like an interview)
- One or two at a time. A good question can fill a whole evening. No need to go through all thirty.
- Answer too. Ask, listen to their answer, then give yours. It is a conversation, not a job interview.
- Pick the right moment. Deep questions land better in the evening, when things are quiet, than between texts at work. Funny ones work anywhere.
- Follow up instead of moving on. "Why?" or "How did that feel?" The second answer is often the most interesting one.
- It works at a distance too. By text, voice note or video call: you can even answer separately and then compare.
12 questions to get to know your boyfriend better
These go a little further than "what's your favorite color." Some take a moment to think about, so give them time.
The questions, ready to copy
- Which little habit of mine do you secretly love?
- What have I said that you can't forget?
- When have you felt happiest with me?
- When do you feel closest to me?
- If we could spend one perfect day together, what would it look like?
- Which achievement matters most to you?
- Where do you feel most like yourself?
- Which moment of your life changed everything for you?
- What's your favorite way to receive love?
- What question don't you dare ask me?
- Which part of you do I still have to discover?
- If you could talk to the child you were, what would you say?
10 funny questions to ask your boyfriend
To lighten the mood, bring some fun to a long distance call, or just laugh together before bed.
The questions, ready to copy
- Your worst giggle fit at the worst possible moment?
- The song you sing off-key with zero shame?
- Your best impression of me?
- The worst dish you've ever cooked?
- If I were an animal, which one, and why?
- Your wildest crackpot theory?
- If our couple had a mascot, what would it be?
- If I came with a warning label, what would it say?
- If you had to give me a new name, what would it be?
- If aliens took me and sent back a double, what little detail would tell you it wasn't me?
8 questions about your future together
Save these for a moment when you are both relaxed. They are not meant to "test" each other, just to dream a little together.
- Where do you see yourself living in five years?
- Which trip would you love for us to take together someday?
- What would our dream home look like?
- What would you like the two of us to learn together?
- What tradition would you like us to start, just for us?
- What matters most to you in a long-term relationship?
- What would you like us to say to each other ten years from now, looking back on today?
- What is the next small project we could do together this month?
What next?
The hardest part with question lists is remembering to come back to them. A simple trick: make it a date. One question every evening, at bedtime. You each answer, then you read the other's answer.
That is exactly what Sunsay does: one question every evening, the same for both of you. You answer separately, in writing or with a voice note, and your answers are revealed once you have both replied. And ten card decks, from Getting to know you to Just for laughs, are there for the nights you want more: most of the cards in this guide come from them.
